


Dear Mike

by Sabishiioni



Category: The Almighty Johnsons
Genre: Angst, Depression, Family Feels, Gen, Mild Language, Suicide, Tissue Warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-14
Updated: 2013-06-14
Packaged: 2017-12-14 23:30:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/842682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sabishiioni/pseuds/Sabishiioni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mike reads a note and reflects on what brought them to this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Mike

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own The Almighty Johnsons. (Heck, they don't even show it here...)  
> Warnings: Read them  
> Follow Me:[Tumblr](http://sabishiioni.tumblr.com/)  
> Mindless Babble: My first fic for this fandom. It's been nibbling at me for a while.

_Dear Mike,_

_I'm sorry I screwed everything up._

“You do this every time, Anders!”

“How is this _my_ fault?!” the small blond shot back.

“You brought her there! You brought them both!” Mike shouted in the other’s face. “You brought that god-killer and you brought Idun there knowing the goddess ceremony was going on!”

Anders blinked, momentarily at a loss for words- something that rarely happened. “What?”

“Bragi! Idun followed him there!” 

The pain that suddenly blossomed in Ander’s jaw and in his arm as it hit the wooden floor of Mike’s bar was nothing compared to the pain in his chest as the older man looked up at his baby brother. He didn't remember seeing the youngest Johnson get up from the bar stool Olaf had sat him upon. From the moment Gaia had walked past him, Axl had been in a state of shock. Now though, Anders could only see something he was not used to seeing from his innocent brother. Hatred burned brightly in eyes that once shone with undying love.

“How could you?! You knew I loved her! You take everything and ruin it for everyone! I hate you!”

“Get out of here Anders. You bring nothing but trouble!”

Anger clouded vision enough so no one saw the pain on the man’s face as he fled.

_Dear Mike,_

_I'm sorry I screwed everything up. I know I can’t be forgiven._

“So…Axl doesn’t want to see me ever again?”

“Honestly? I don't think anyone wants to see you again.” Ty stood at the doorway into Ander’s office. The older brother sat at his desk, unable to look up.

“Even you?”

“Yeah, especially me. Dawn still won’t even talk to me and I know it’s your fault.” The former god took a step back, intending to leave. “Just…stay away from us. We’ll be fine on our own.”

Anders listened to the footsteps as Ty left, refusing to acknowledge the tears streaming down his face.

_Dear Mike,_

_I'm sorry I screwed everything up. I know I can’t be forgiven. I don’t know how to fix this and I don’t think there is a way._

Dawn glanced into her boss’s office, worry lining her face. Even though this had been happening for a month, she was still not used to it. It just seemed so unnatural to see Anders working silently at his desk. True, work was getting done and business had increased, but she wasn’t sure she liked the price.

Once again, her gaze drifted to the man. He had shaved his beard and cropped his hair short, making him look younger and almost vulnerable. He had lost weight and his skin was pale with dark bags under his eyes- eyes that were dull and lifeless. Hands shook as they hovered over the keyboard as he seemed to struggle to find the words he needed.

“Anders? It’s almost lunch time. I was going to try that new sandwich shop across the street. Did you want to come with me?”

“No…Thank you. Enjoy your lunch.”

She wasn’t sure what disturbed her more- the fact that he was being polite to her or the rasp in his voice.

_Dear Mike,_

_I'm sorry I screwed everything up. I know I can’t be forgiven. I don’t know how to fix this and I don’t think there is a way. Knowing that those I once called my family no longer think of me as such hurts more than words can say._

Olaf sat on a surfboard, bobbing in the small waves of the ocean. There were no large waves today but he really hadn’t expected there to be any. All he wanted was the peace of the ocean to calm his thoughts.

He stared down at the picture he had laminated so could always keep it with him. He stared back from the photo along with three others. He had his arms around a much younger Mike and Anders while Ty stood with a baby Axl cradled in his arms. He gently brushed over the faces.

What had happened? What had torn apart his family? Sure, their abusive father had done a good chuck of damage as well as Freya abandoning them to become a tree. But he had thought that the plight of the gods, the return of Odin, would bring them closer.

Mike and Axl were still looking for Frigg. Ty was no longer a god and spent a good amount of time adjusting to mortal life. And Anders…well, he had been banished from the family, by word of Odin. Even he had not gone to check on his second eldest grandson. Part of him feared what he would find.

Anders had disappeared after Ty’s 21st birthday and didn’t return until Axl’s. Olaf had always figured the only reason he stayed this time was simply because of Odin. So that meant that Anders had either returned to his old habits, of which Olaf wanted no part of or… The youthful old man did not want to think about that option.

It would mean that Anders had a heart that could be broken.

_Dear Mike,_

_I'm sorry I screwed everything up. I know I can’t be forgiven. I don’t know how to fix this and I don’t think there is a way. Knowing that those I once called my family no longer think of me as such hurts more than words can say. I think I found a way to help, even though I know you don’t want my help._

Axl watched Gaia play with Stacy on the beach. The one he loved barely even looked at him anymore, usually asking about Anders instead. She had stopped questioning him though. It was actually a blessing as each time she had asked, it had torn out another piece of his heart.

He looked down at his hot dog. Olaf had suggested they take one day to go out, forget god shit and just have fun. He and Mike were at the barbeque, grilling hot dogs, hamburgers and chicken filets. Ty sat basking in the sun, still not able to get enough of it. Ingrid was fussing about him, trying to cover him in sunscreen so he wouldn’t burn. Michel sat under an umbrella, reading and trying very hard to look like she wasn’t enjoying herself.

“Something wrong with the hot dog?”

Axl’s head shot up as his best friend sat down next to him. Zeb could never be swayed from being by his side and it warmed the young god’s heart. Both of them.

“No, the food’s good. It just feel like something’s missing.”

“There is, but you wouldn’t like hearing it.”

Axl looked at his friend and flat mate, curiously. On rare occasions, Zeb could be surprisingly insightful. “Tell me anyways.”

“One of your brother’s isn’t here. Anders is still missing from your life.”

“He deserves to be! He screwed up things with me and Gaia! And with Ty and Dawn! He ruins everything he touches!”

“Seems to me, he saved us from a long time in jail.” He shrugged. “And then he went and got that stick the goddess can use to do stuff…”

Axl returned his gaze to his plate. Yes, Anders had done that. But hadn’t that just been on orders from their mother? He suddenly remembered all the time he had spent with his brother- the teasing, the women, and the late night talks. He remembered laughing as a drunken Anders chased a slightly stoned Olaf around the Christmas tree with a sprig of mistletoe. Anders may have been a crude, self-serving prick, but he was also the only brother that was relaxed about life.

Maybe…Maybe Zeb was right. He would give Anders another chance. If he stayed away from Gaia.

_Dear Mike,_

_I'm sorry I screwed everything up. I know I can’t be forgiven. I don’t know how to fix this and I don’t think there is a way. Knowing that those I once called my family no longer think of me as such hurts more than words can say. I think I found a way to help, even though I know you don’t want my help. I can only hope this will be enough and serve to make everyone happy._

_Love,_

_Anders_

Mike watched as the coroner zipped up the black body bag, the note clutched tightly in his hand. His brother’s pale face vanished under the black plastic. He heard a soft sobbing coming from the kitchen accompanied by hushed whispers of comfort as Ty consoled Dawn. It had been the woman who found Anders when he failed to show up to work.

Anders.

Mike felt his own cheeks becoming wet with tears. He hadn’t known, hadn’t even thought that his brother could come to this. It didn’t seem possible.

Yet the empty bottles of pain pills and vodka told another story, showed a different side to his little brother. 

He would have to tell Axl. And Gaia. He wasn’t sure if he had the strength to do it. A large hand clamped down on his shoulder as his grandfather slid down the wall next to him.

Mike sighed, struggling to keep his tears in check. “I hope he found the peace we denied him.”

“Khalil Gibran once wrote, ‘Death most resembles a prophet who is without honor in his homeland or a poet who is a stranger among his people.’”

Mike scoffed through his tears. “Anders would’ve liked that one.”

“Anders was the one who told it to me.”

***  
Days later, Mike stood in front of a large tree. His family stood behind him, as well as the goddess and even Dawn. It had been Anders' last wish to have his ashes scattered around an apple tree. He hadn’t wanted a funeral, though it was obvious that had been a recent change in his will. Mike swallowed around the lump in his throat only just coming to understand why.

In Anders' mind, there would be no one to mourn him and only one to mourn Bragi.

Silently, he scattered the ashes of his brother at the base of the tree. Gaia stepped forward, touching the rough bark. Immediately, the tree blossomed and bore fruit. She plucked an apple and set it on the ground, an offering from a goddess to her soul mate.

No words were spoken that day, in honor of god of poetry. Glasses were raised to honor the memory of the man lost to them.

But no one was happy.


End file.
